Manchester United – Shaun O’Donnell – Observer reader
8/10 The belief is coming back and although we have been fortunate in a couple of games we are starting to show signs that we’re slowly moving through the gears. The team has been ripped apart by injuries but LVG has managed to put out various patched-up sides and put together a six-game winning streak. Against Southampton we were really poor and only had three attempts on goal but ended up winning 2-1, which is a clear indication that we aren’t creating enough opportunities. Arsenal away was a high point (beating a toothless Liverpool came second) and the low point was obviously the capitulation to a Leicester team who have failed to win since.
The stars De Gea has been immense, he has had a makeshift defence in front of him all season and has produced crucial saves, stopped penalties and matured into the best keeper in the league. And Carrick’s return has seen us win six games on the bounce: he adds a calming influence.
The flops I still don’t think Fellaini belongs in a red shirt. He has had a good run of games due to injuries but he lacks pace and is very one-dimensional. Against Southampton he was overrun. And in away games Mata is a passenger and lacks physicality. He would struggle to tackle a salad.
The manager Our squad had become bloated and full of mediocre players and LVG set about the first wave of culling with no sentiment. He has added six quality players and hasn’t been shy in giving youth a chance. The restoration job wasn’t going to happen overnight, but the winning mentality is returning. We just need to get key players back and a settled defence. 7/10
Who would play him in a movie? Sir Anthony Hopkins as Hannibal Lecter. Sophisticated, charming, and capable of inflicting pain.
Newcastle United – Richard & David Holmes – Observer readers
7/10 Newcastle never fail to surprise. A few weeks into the season many fans thought we were relegation fodder and the atmosphere was turning toxic again. But after some startling results and spirited, entertaining performances, it’s all changed again. The sackpardew.com website must surely be struggling for hits. The idea of beating Manchester City, Liverpool, Tottenham and Chelsea would have seemed daft after that dreadful 4-0 thrashing at Southampton, but those triumphs revealed a gutsy, committed side with no shortage of youthful talent and energy. Hope springs eternal.
The stars Daryl Janmaat, known as the Debuchy Upgrade, has been outstanding at right‑back while Sunderland deserter/Geordie boy Jack Colback has brought more tenacity to our midfield. And who would have guessed that Ayoze Pérez, a young signing from the Spanish second division, would get to grips with the Premier League so fast. As for Moussa Sissoko – it will be tough to hold on to him come January.
The flops Hatem Ben Arfa looks to have burned his bridges with Newcastle – and now even Hull. He could have been a legend but we’re better without him (and we never thought we’d say that). Steven Taylor, meanwhile, is committed to the cause but remains a disciplinary liability.
The manager He’s still no fans’ favourite, but credit to Pardew, he’s managed to pull it back from the brink. His faith in youth has paid off, with the likes of Sammy Ameobi, Paul Dummett and Rolando Aarons all making vital contributions. 7/10
Who would play him in a movie? Steve McQueen, in Great Escape mode.
QPR – Adam Boxer – QPR.VitalFootball.co.uk
6/10 It’s been a mixed bag. Our resurgent home form has been tempered by a dismal away record – albeit including visits to the loftier-placed sides in the division. Performances have improved drastically in recent months ,with excellent showings against Chelsea, Liverpool and Manchester City to name but a few, but it’s difficult to ignore some disappointing showings on the road.
The stars As predicted, Charlie Austin has hit the ground running and is certainly staking a case for Roy Hodgson’s next squad. His eye for goal has hauled Rangers out of many precarious positions and we’d be worse off without his influence. Honourable mentions must go to Richard Dunne, whose experience has been pivotal, and Karl Henry, who has surprised many with some stellar performances.
The flops Rio Ferdinand has been breathtakingly disappointing and has been rightly dropped. His dressing room influence is a positive if you believe what you read, but performance-wise he has flattered to deceive.
The manager After a decidedly ropey start, the progress he’s making is positive. Chucking a random formation together pre-season and asking the players to get on board was always going to be sink or swim, and it was sinking fast. So credit to Redknapp for recognising the error and swallowing his pride. I’ll give him 5/10 – there’s much work still to do.
Who would play him in a movie? David Jason would do a fine job. And Bob Hoskins would have done the character great justice too, I’m sure. Triffic.
Southampton – Ben Gammon – @GoMarchingIn
9/10 I’m very happy with how it’s gone. If anyone had said at the start of the season that we’d be fifth in December most fans would have laughed given the events that took place at the club over the summer. The exodus, which raised around £90m, left us in a situation where achieving any sort of consistency or rhythm in the new campaign seemed impossible. Somehow, though, we’ve done it. That said, the recent defeat at Burnley was the latest in a tough run of results. A lack of ruthlessness in recent games is something I hope Ronald Koeman will look to address in January.
The stars Graziano Pellè, signed from Feyenoord, has made most of the headlines with his 10 goals in all competitions, and Dusan Tadic, from Twente, has seven assists in the league so far. The pair of them have already developed a really good understanding.
The flop Sadio Mané. After a lively start, the Senegalese winger has ailed to justify his £10m transfer fee.
The manager The job Koeman did bringing in new faces, introducing his ideas, getting the squad to gel and persuading Morgan Schneiderlin to stay despite all the upheaval was nothing short of fantastic. But we’re now entering their most testing time of the season and this will be a much bigger test for the Dutchman. 9/10
Who would play him in a movie? Paul Bettany (A Beautiful Mind, Da Vinci Code, Iron Man etc). He would probably have to bulk up a bit for the role, but he seems well suited. Both of them look calm on the surface, but also like the type you really would not want to cross.
Stoke City – Rob Holloway – Observer reader
6.5/10 My feelings on the season change on a weekly basis. After the fantastic wins over Manchester City and Tottenham – both away from home – and the annual victory over Arsenal, we seemed on course for one of the best seasons in living memory. But when you have to witness the lame defeats to Aston Villa, Leicester and Burnley (all at home) you begin to ask questions … That said, despite the lack of any real consistency, we are still on track for a mid-table finish – and with our rotten run of injuries, that would be another successful season.
The stars Bojan! It took our Spanish forward a couple of months to find his feet, but he’s certainly in his element now. For the best part of two months he has been worth the admission fee alone. You can see why he was regarded in the same class as Lionel Messi earlier in his career. At £500,000, surely he is one of the best transfers in Premier League history?
The flop Marko Arnautovic. I was saying exactly the same thing about him at this time last year and Arnie had a storming end to the season, so hopefully it will have the same impact this time around … At the top of his game he would walk into most Premier League teams, but this season he would have struggled to get into the Dog & Duck’s first XI.
The manager Mark Hughes continues to do a very good job on a shoestring budget compared to a lot of our rivals. It has been hard to pick a settled side this season due to the sheer number of injuries but as this settles down in the new year, and with the addition of a new face or two, the future looks bright. 6.5/10
Who would play him in a movie? No one has ever nailed the role better than Home & Away’s Ailsa Stewart.
Sunderland – Peter Sixsmith – salutsunderland.com
6/10 The season has been, er, OK so far … 10 draws, two wins and three defeats just about says it all. We’re hard to beat (although Southampton may disagree with that) but not quite sharp enough to win games. Hopefully the high will come today between 1.30pm and 3.30pm, with the low the rather bewildering collapse at St Mary’s.
The stars Lee Cattermole has been outstanding, turning in a series of good performances culminating in a superb display against Chelsea as we softened them up at the end of November. His midfield chum Seb Larsson has also done well and seems happy in this role. John O’Shea has marshalled the back four, Santiago Vergini has won over many doubters and Anthony Réveillère looks top quality. It’s just a pity the attackers haven’t been as effective as the defenders.
The flops No real failures, although poor Jozy Altidore continues to look as if he would be happier playing for Hull Kingston Rovers. Billy Jones’s injuries are worrying – we are really short of full backs – and Jack Rodwell needs to start showing why we paid such a large fee for him.
The manager Poyet has done well. He is still picking up the pieces from the mess that Martin O’Neill and Paolo Di Canio left behind and has done well in creating a good atmosphere among the players. They seem to be a together group, and are clearly impressed by Gus’s professionalism. He has a clear view of what this fine old club can achieve, and it’s to be hoped that he is given enough time to see it through. The fact that no money was wasted in the last transfer window should endear him to the owner. 8/10
Who should play him in a movie? Tony Hart, because he was good at drawing, too. I’ll get my coat.
Swansea City – Kevin Elphick – swansea.vitalfootball.co.uk
8/10 It’s been very solid so far. It’s been well documented that we’ve dropped too many points from winning positions, but after the setbacks in the summer – players departing as Garry Monk faced up to the challenge of his first ever managerial job in the top flight – it’s been a great start for us, and one that very few fans really expected.
The stars The goalkeeper Lucasz Fabianski, midfielders Ki Sung-yueng and Gylfi Sigurdsson, and striker Wilfried Bony – who simply can’t stop scoring in 2014 – have made the biggest impacts. Fabianski has arguably been our best signing of the summer, picked up on a free from Arsenal, while no player creates more chances for the team or sets up more of our goals (mostly scored by Bony) than Sigurdsson, who returned in the summer.
The flops There really haven’t been any. Bafétimbi Gomis, who joined on a free from Lyon, hasn’t made much of an impression but that’s because he’ll never get ahead of Bony in the starting lineup - at least not until the new year when the Ivorian is away on Africa Cup of Nations duty.
The manager It has been an impressive 8/10 performance. He’s done really well, especially considering it’s his first job and he’s had to deal with a number of big players departing. The way he handled Vorm, Davies, Michu, De Guzman, Chico and Hernández all moving on has been brilliant. There is now some important work to do in January – mainly finding another attacker to give us options while Bony is away.
Who would play him in a movie? Damian Lewis. A dead ringer (almost).
Tottenham Hotspur – Dave Mason – Observer reader
3/10 I’m decidedly unhappy. We’re mentally and physically bankrupt, especially at home. Successive matches in September against FK Partizan away and WBA at home typified our approach. We used 21 different players in four days and managed one attempt on target in total. We’ve reached a stage where we ‘re grateful for a home point against Crystal Palace. There has been some recent excitement at Aston Villa and Hull but only after dreadful first halfs, and the reduction of the opposition to 10 men on both occasions. That is when we show our “class” and go into flat-track-bully overdrive. Surprisingly, when we went into the lead in those games, and at Swansea, there was an orgy of ecstatic celebration both times, as if it meant something to the players. Why can’t they show this level of passion from the start, all the time?
The stars Lloris has been outstanding, and Harry Kane, as in the old adage, makes his own luck through his unflagging efforts. Inject his work rate into the others and the crowd would respond well.
The flops. Strikers who don’t score; ineffective wide men (if you are Lennon or Townsend and you can’t get a regular start in this team, you need to take a good, long look at yourself); nine central-midfield players; and our ever-changing back four which is increasingly reminding me of the worst days of the mid-70s.
The manager Daniel Levy’s autobiography will be called “I’ve got an idea. There’s this new manager I’ve heard about …” He amazes me with his unerring ability to spot a manager who will under-perform. Pochettino is struggling. There is a lack of cohesion in selection and tactics and some puzzling substitutions. 3/10
Who would play him in a movie? Norman Wisdom. With a bit of luck Pochettino could be in the early stages of one of Wisdom’s films: a hapless oaf at the start who ends up achieving unlikely success.
West Brom – Richard Jefferson – @richbaggie
4/10 We had a half-decent start but the past two months have been desperate with too many defeats and some pretty awful football. Managing to seal a win against Villa is an obvious high point, while losing at Bournemouth in the League Cup is the obvious low.
The stars Saido Berahino, Craig Gardner, Joleon Lescott and Sébastien Pocognoli are the only ones who have consistently risen above average. Lescott, especially, has been a class act.
The flops Given the £10m price tag, Brown Ideye stands out as an underachiever – although he hasn’t been given many chances to prove his worth.
The manager While the appointment of Alan Irvine was a shock, what has followed has been anything but. Sheffield Wednesday fans told us to expect a negative manager too worried about the opposition and too quick to blame others; a manager who struggles to manage his substitutions and then talks positively about a grim performance despite all the evidence to the contrary. This is exactly what we’ve seen for the most part. There is very little support for him right now – although the criticism he has received does seem to have stung him: there were positive signs against Villa that he is prepared to be more flexible in his approach. 5/10
Who would play him in a movie? Dermot Morgan/Father Ted.
West Ham – Pete May – hammersintheheart.blogspot.co.uk
9/10 It’s been better than anyone could have expected. When could West Ham fans last chant (not entirely seriously): “Barcelona, we’re coming for you”? Beating Manchester City has to be a highlight, as was the 3-1 defeat of Liverpool. The whole club feels much more United.
The stars Alex Song has calmly dominated the midfield despite taking the difficult step up from Barcelona. Diafra Sakho is hungry and has been a hugely impressive finisher. Stewart Downing looks rejuvenated at the top of the midfield diamond; Valencia has impressed with his pace and heading ability; and the full-backs Cresswell and Jenkinson have made a lot of goals with their crosses. Noble, Tomkins, Reid and Collins have all been consistent. Even Andy Carroll looks fit and a force again. And to show it’s been a team effort, we’ve had 11 players contributing goals.
The flops Amazingly, none – aside from the problems of the loaned-out Ravel Morrison. Even Russell Brand kissing Big Sam proved surprisingly successful.
The manager Last season’s breakdown between the manager and a certain section of the crowd has proved cathartic. He’s now playing attractive football with two strikers and his PR has improved. Yes, Sam’s been given big money to spend, but he’s bought really well. Teddy Sheringham deserves some credit as attacking coach, too, but the fans who blamed Allardyce for every uninspired performance last season must now accept that he’s done brilliantly so far. 9/10
Who would play him in a movie? The late Warren Clarke would have been ideal. Ray Winstone and Phill Jupitus could do it too. It’s just a case of perfecting that “respecting the point” speech.
• Part 1: Arsenal to Manchester City
