I received a wonderful message from Bob in Kent while hosting the afternoon show on TalkSport on New Year’s Eve. “Can’t believe you’re still employing Max Rushden,” it read. “He’s so tedious. I still won’t listen while he’s on. If you rate him, put him on with Simon Jordan, then you’ll see his intellect. Is he cheap? Is that it? Please explain to me, why? Bob, Kent.” Season’s greetings to you too, Bob.
I’ve had worse. Bob’s just curious. The truth is that not everything is for everyone, certainly I am not for Bob in Kent. The hope is that, as a broadcaster, you are at least bearable for a reasonable proportion of the audience, and on a good day even enjoyable to some.
And we are all Bob in Kent for some part of the ever-widening world of football broadcasting. And while very aware that this horse has bolted, the idea of filming every moment of every game on your phone feels totally anathema to my love of going to football. Don’t film the Toploader gig, just enjoy it. Live in the moment.
All my seminal memories of the Newmarket Road End in the 1990s and early 2000s are just that; memories. The pre-mobile age, to lose yourself in the game – or more often be bored out of your mind. The lack of any footage of these moments has probably helped me curate such memories into a more exciting version of the truth. And it is also just the nostalgia talking – I probably would be a vlogger if I’d been born 20 years later.
Without badly framed mobile phone footage we would have been deprived of some of the greatest moments of 2025. Panning from one disbelieving Crystal Palace fan to the next at Wembley, trying to work out how to behave at winning the FA Cup. The shots from pubs in almost every city on earth of delirious Spurs fans at the full-time whistle in the Europa League final. Every seat in Hampden and every bar in Scotland as the ball leaves Kenny McLean’s boot – a nation simultaneously realising the trajectory of the ball. Of course your average fan filming a bit isn’t the same as someone dedicated to cataloguing every moment of every game with a selfie stick. You can see why it grates. But without it the greatest moment of 2025 would have passed a lot of us by.
In a sea of uninteresting statistics, Charlton Athletic’s 20-year unbeaten run at Fratton Park is right up there. And then came Monday night. It’s 1-0 to Portsmouth in the 95th minute. Harvey Knibbs equalises for the Addicks in the 96th minute, before Yang Min-hyeok wins it for Pompey in the 98th. The raw facts are simple, but caught on camera you get the life of a football fan distilled into 90 seconds. The limbs after the Charlton goal, the “Derrrrrr. Der de derrrr. Derr de derrrr derrr de derrr derr deerrr. Derr der darrrre … Derr derrr der darr, der de der darrr der di der CHARLTON”. That then rolls into famous stat … “We never lose, at Fratton Park, we ne-ev-er lose at Fratton Park, we never lose at Fratton Park, we ne-ev-er lose, at Fratton Park …”
It is impossible to emphasise the perfection of the comedic timing. There is just enough space between the chant reaching its natural conclusion and Yang picking the ball up for Pompey and whacking it in the bottom corner. Perhaps two or three seconds for the Charlton fans who are actually watching the action to realise what is happening.
Someone called Paul Davenport is right by the home supporters, perfectly capturing how many Charlton fans are goading the oppo, clueless to the pain that’s about to hit from the other end of the pitch, like those bleak photos of people posing by the sea with a Tsunami behind them. It’s only the noise that brings them firmly back down to reality.
From behind the goal another short but perfect voice over. “No no no no no, don’t you fucking dare … no no NO NO NO NO NO.” Like the Vicar of Dibley without the payoff. Over in the Portsmouth end, behind the goal just to the left, as Yang winds his right-foot back, from camera right, an incredibly angry: “FARRRRRKIN’ SHOOOOT.” And he does shoot. It’s glorious.
Back to the away end. Two vloggers have the camera pointing at their faces. Tom Arch is probably mid-20s, a wispy moustache. Knibbs scores and he just repeats: “YEEEEAAAAAAHHHH,” one arm aloft. The joy is unbridled. A couple of “Come ons!” to the camera and then a rousing: “We never lose at Fratton Park.” It’s not just Tom. It’s everyone around him. The conviction. His camera work is good, panning left and right – they all believe. Suddenly his face stops like Ian Wright when he sees Mr Pigden. “Noooooo.” One hand on his head. He smiles, in that perfect fan-reaction. How is this possible? “Fair play,” he says generously.
Meanwhile @BigBadBraz (real name Charlie) is perhaps 30-35. Solid beard. He knows Charlton never lose at Fratton Park. He’s singing it loudly. The guy next to him still has his hands aloft from the goal and then suddenly: “I don’t believe it.” The camera pans round to a teenager who looks like he’s just seen a murder. “That is unbelievable. That is quite unbelievable.”
One criticism of the vlogging life is that it is, by nature, performative. A crisis of all modern broadcasting is that to be seen you have to stand out and it’s much easier to be ridiculous or vomit out extreme opinions rather than making engaging, interesting, and clever content. But in moments such as this you can’t fake it, because all fans know the feeling of conceding in injury time.
And both these vlogs are lovely. Tom is open and vulnerable as he paces to the game. At the end of his video, Charlie articulates the reality of loving a football team better than a million articles I could write. “Realistically that is one of the most embarrassing moments of my life … once again it’s 1am and I’m sitting in a dark fucking car park with my mate … and I’m like, what’s it all about?”
It’s a fair question that we’ve all asked so many times, and perhaps it’s that some days you’re not on the end of it. But thank you for delivering and posting the highlight of 2025. I’ll be less Bob in Kent for the vlogging world from now on.
