Tottenham 0-0 Newcastle: No need for the neighbours to complain about the decibel levels. Sounds silent inside the stadium.

Everton 0-0 Bournemouth: Barry should open the scoring but misses from very close range. Poor Thierno.

Tottenham 0-0 Newcastle: Odobert off, Tel on.

Chelsea 1-0 Leeds: Palmer is at the heart of everything for Chelsea, he flicks the ball into Joao Pedro’s path but he flashes his shot wide.

Tottenham 0-0 Newcastle: Tel seems to be getting prepared to replace the Frenchman.

Tottenham 0-0 Newcastle: More concern for Spurs with Odobert down on the ground needing lengthy treatment.

Chelsea 1-0 Leeds: There are calls for a penalty after Gusto and Gudmundsson tangle in the box. There is a pull on the shorts but the Leeds man goes down too easily.

Everton 0-0 Bournemouth: Toth fires a free-kick at goal but Pickford is behind it.

Tottenham 0-0 Newcastle: Spurs look to be making progress on the attack but they end up turning around and the ball ends up back with the defence. That does not please the fans.

Chelsea 1-0 Leeds: GOAL! Palmer finds space in midfield, opens himself up and slips a through ball for Joao Pedro, who is quicker than the defender, allowing him time to dink it over Darlow.

Tottenham 0-0 Newcastle: Spurs lift the ball into the box and Solanke goes down under pressure from behind. The striker wants a penalty but there is no chance of that.

Chelsea 0-0 Leeds: The Blues have a free-kick around 30 yards from goal. It is worked smartly into the box, Pedro chests it down but can’t make effective contact on the volley.

Chelsea 0-0 Leeds: Palmer takes aim from 20 yards but there is no power in the shot, allowing Leeds get possession and counter but it ends with Gudmundsson committing a foul and getting harshly booked.

Tottenham 0-0 Newcastle: Burn knocks the ball down for Ramsey to attack, he miscues his shot and Van de Ven sends it behind. The crowd is getting agitated.

Tottenham 0-0 Newcastle: Howe’s side are onto their fifth corner in the first 15 minutes. Vicario punches clear on this occasion.

Tottenham 0-0 Newcastle: The visitors are looking really dangerous, especially down the right with Elanga and Trippier. Spurs are in a battle here.

Everton 0-0 Bournemouth: NO GOAL! Ndiaye pokes the ball into the net but he is well offside.

Tottenham 0-0 Newcastle: Elanga sends in a low cross, which Barnes flicks at goal but his cheeky effort is straight at the goalkeeper.

Chelsea 0-0 Leeds: Pedro flicks a pass through for Estevao to chase but Darlow is alert, coming out quickly to collect.

Tottenham 0-0 Newcastle: Willock has his head in his hands after seeing his shot from 20 yards slipping a millimetre wide of the post.

Tottenham 0-0 Newcastle: Simons gets the ball inside the box, shifts and has a fine chance to test the goalkeeper but drags his shot wide.

“Who came up with that Newcastle kit!? Yikes,” says Joe Pearson. It’s a jazzy number.

Tottenham 0-0 Newcastle: Another chance for Newcastle, culminating with Solanke clearing a cross straight against Botman’s head, sending the ball wide.

Tottenham 0-0 Newcastle: Elanga sends in a corner which bounces off a surprised Dragusin and flies over his own bar.

Chelsea 0-0 Leeds: Seems quite an old school kit choice from Leeds, who have their own shirts and shorts on with blue away socks, making it the opposite of Chelsea’s outfit. Nice to see.

“You described Newcastle as “flat”,” Chris Paraskevas points out. “I think that’s being generous: flat suggests some form of consistency of shape or form. At the moment if this team were to have a geometric shape or physical form representing them, perhaps a scalene triangle would be more appropriate (sides and angles completely out of sync and out of shape).

“Anyway, this is what this stupid club has driven me to: mathematics before 7am.

“It’s a new low for Eddie Howe ...”

Players are in tunnels. Prepare yourself!

Richard Hirst gets in touch to say: “Glad you mentioned Leroy as well as Liam, since it gives me the opportunity to bring out the Fulham link. I had hoped that Liam would take over at Fulham when Marco Silva leaves; that gentler introduction might have spared him some of the nonsense that he is having to put up with now. Despite him managing SW6’s second team, I wish him well.”

“That’s eighth placed Everton to you!” emails Matt Burtz. “They also are quietly joint fourth in goals allowed. If they could score even a few more goals they would easily be in/threatening for the European places (which they already sort of are).”

Not 100% sure what having the presentation team walking around the pitch in the rain adds to the buildup.

It is chucking it down at the Tottenham Hotspur Stadium.

If finding out if a grown man needs a hair cut is more your sort of thing, join Scott Murray for West Ham v Manchester United.

Get this in your ears.

“Leeds United and Shrewsbury Town fan here, both in action tonight, wondering how they’ll get on,” writes Jeremy Boyce. “Frankly, if the Nasties can scramble a nasty point at the Bridge tonight it will be a miracle, you never know, there is history between these two, ask Eddie Gray or David Webb. As for Shrewsbury, another doomscroll relegation six-pointer tonight at home to mighty Barrow, a fixture that takes me back at least 40 years to my early days live footie. 2 - 2 40 years ago If memory serves. A point would serve us well tonight. As for the rest, it’s score draws all the way isn’t it ? Unless Nuno can spoil Carrick’s party time. Or otherwise Norwich, I’m betting on them making the play-offs, any takers

“Shame there isn’t a mid-week coupon to send (ask yer dad).”

Big night for the Shrews.

I do still write Leroy Rosenior and need to correct myself.

Liam Rosenior looks chipper.

I’ve been to a few Newcastle games in recent weeks and they’ve been very flat, so I have a very narrow opinion of their overall performance but it feels like a team that needs waking from a malaise.

Eddie Howe does not seem to be under much pressure …

I quite like a bit of Liam Rosenior but everyone on da socials loves da bantz.

Get yourself primed for Everton v Bournemouth!