Mike Ford, the assistant coach, reckons none of the England team would make a World XV. My mother reckons too much butter on your parsnips makes you fat.
Of the glaringly unavoidable observations about England's bruised squad, the assertion that their individuals do not rank alongside players from New Zealand, South Africa and Australia is the easiest to make. After two games, it is hard to recall more than a few moments of international-class rugby, at least in attack. The forwards scrummaged well as a unit against South Africa but, individually, they were painfully slow to the breakdown, which is where the Springboks really killed England; and Jason Robinson made several fine runs. Elsewhere there was nothing.
However, England are struggling even in comparison with the so-called lesser teams here.
Of course, teams win matches. Very rarely - Joel Stransky in the 1995 final, notwithstanding - does a single player do the damage on his own. In this tournament, the collective has shone, often to the surprise of bookmakers and the favourites.
Tonga hung on with 13 men to overcome Samoa; Fiji, who had two players sent off and whose yellow card tally hit double figures for the tournament, didn't step lightly in seeing off Canada; the united will of Georgia almost did for Ireland.
These are performances that relied hugely on the team ethic, rather than individual brilliance. It's not just that England don't have what Ford calls world-class stars. As a unit, they still can't do it, even with the very good players they do have, players with supposedly better pedigrees than those of the minnows.
Nevertheless, if we are to play the Mike Ford game, several players have already laid down markers for inclusion in a World XV. Among my favourites have been the Fiji winger Vilimoni Delasau, obviously Bryan Habana; Argentina's scrum-half Agustín Pichot, his South African counterpart Fourie du Preez; the very classy All Black Jerry Collins, the old bull Os du Randt... and, no - despite Jason Robinson's heroics - not a single Englishman.
