THE PUSGAFFES?
Sure, volleying a can of Tin from the bath straight into the bin feels good, but have you ever felt the rush of successfully slipping a foreign word in a sentence? Whether Football Daily is subtly and frivolously deploying a “merci” at Pret a Manger or winning hearts and minds at Football Daily Towers by describing an overcome hangover as the greatest remontada since Barcelona’s 6-1 win over PSG in 2017, there is simply nothing like the smugness one feels after borrowing a word or two from our European brethren.
In recent years, German words have, rather pleasingly, crept into the football lexicon. Have you even played Football/Championship Manager if you don’t know what a raumdeuter (translation: space investigator or space invader) is? Readers, just wait for the reaction from your peers when you successfully drop bananenflanke (banana-shaped cross) or gurkenspiel (cucumber game/boring game) into casual conversation. In this week’s deep dive into the more unusual corners of the internet, Football Daily happened upon a new term – “kacktor”, which literally translates as “sh!t goal” – when perusing a compilation, made by German broadcaster WDR, of the worst goals scored in 2025.
Some of the efforts are truly mesmeric. It possibly doesn’t get better than our opener from Borussia Dortmund II’s Franz Roggow, who somehow manages to convert a wild own goal after a goalmouth scramble for the ages. A penny for the thoughts of Jan Himel, of SG Oberense 2, who decided (under almost zero pressure) to pick out the top corner of his own goal when attempting a clearance. And please enjoy Patrick Bruns’ towering header for Alemannia Salzbergen, converting the rebound into his own goal coming just seconds after an equally spectacular miss from opponents ASV Altenlingen.
Seemingly determined to make a global 2026 list, Stockport County put forward their entry at the weekend in the 3-2 win over Rotherham, goalkeeper Ben Hinchliffe launching a counter attack straight into the bent-over behind of teammate Joe Olowu, the pair watching on helplessly as the ball ballooned back over Hinchliffe’s head and into the empty net. You can keep your Puskás awards, your Big Website top 100s, Fifa’s The Best ceremony. Football Daily is, from this day forward, only interested in The Worst, and we eagerly anticipate WDR’s end-of-year compilation in which we can once again revel in a hearty dose of schadenfreude.
LIVE ON BIG WEBSITE
Join Michael Butler from 8pm GMT for hot minute-by-minute updates on Marseille 2-2 Liverpool in Bigger Cup, while Luke McLaughlin will have all the goals from the other games, including Chelsea 2-0 Pafos and Newcastle 3-2 PSV, in his clockwatch.
QUOTE OF THE DAY
“I don’t have the answers. I take full responsibility of not being able to score the goals I should do. I just apologise to everyone; every single City supporter and every single supporter that travelled, because in the end it’s embarrassing. Bodø, they played some incredible football, and in the end it’s deserved. Honestly, I don’t know what to say because I don’t have the answers, and what I can say is sorry” – perhaps because he’s the Norwegian with the broadest shoulders in the Manchester City team, Erling Haaland faces up to the media to issue a grovelling apology after his boys took one hell of a Bigger Cup beating in an Arctic circle fishing town.
FOOTBALL DAILY LETTERS
How do you know that Dan Levy is ‘not that one’ (yesterday’s Football Daily letters)? Have you called or emailed this subscriber to check in? That would surely take so long to obtain a response that his contribution might then be well out of date. I’m interested to know Football Daily’s service levels for checking on facts, data and details. Or perhaps you just print and hope Dan Levy does not respond later in the week? With prizes on offer, any scoundrel (like this one) will happily make a contribution. Who knows, maybe the Daniel Levy has moved north to get away from the Spurs whingers? Maybe he is an interested investor in Stockport – in which case FD has an exclusive” – David Beckham (OK, Marc Meldrum).
Further to Dan (not that one) writing about the comic own goal at Stockport County, it’s definitely time to relive Cambridge United’s greatest but most @rsey goal ever, scored against Notts County. I’m now wondering whether County goalies specifically train for this kind of thing?” – John Kyle.
Manchester City get beat by Bodø. A brash superpower taught a lesson by plucky Scandinavians. I’m sure there’s a metaphor here somewhere” – Kev McCready.
I know it is not his surname, but as it sounds more poetic, can a missed Panenka now be known as a ‘Brahim’? As Pelé is alleged to have said after watching Panenka take his, er, ‘Panenka’ – he is ‘either a genius or a madman’” – Aram Raworth.
If you have any, please send letters to the.boss@theguardian.com. Today’s winner of our letter o’ the day is … Kev McCready, who lands some hot Football Weekly merch. Terms and conditions for our competitions are here.
RECOMMENDED LISTENING
Join Max Rushden, Barry Glendenning and the rest of the Football Weekly pod squad as they chew over City’s arctic meltdown, and more.
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