MEH-DLINE DAY?
This used to be a country where transfer deadline day meant something. Gone are the days that Football Daily could buy a Freddo for 10p and gone are the days that Sky Sports news reporters could be found lurking in the winter rain outside Premier League training grounds at 11pm (GMT), decked in their finest yellow ties and fighting for their broadcasting lives against youths brandishing naughty purple objects as they brought news of Giannelli Imbula’s impending club-record move from Porto to Stoke City. From dodgy fax machines to Jim White, to Peter Odenwingie in a car park, to Alfredo Di Stéfano’s dubious expression towards Julien Faubert [and don’t forget roll-up man – Football Daily Ed], deadline day used to be box office, worth staying up past your bedtime for.
But on this deadline day the deals didn’t appear to make sense. Rock-bottom Wolves decided that selling their best striker, Jørgen Strand Larsen, to relegation rivals Crystal Palace was a good idea. That said, just why Palace decided to green-light the £43m signing of the Norwegian (one league goal this season) after Jean-Philippe Mateta’s move to Milan collapsed remains to be seen. Just why on earth were Milan in the market for a striker in the first place? The Rossoneri signed the forwards Christopher Nkunku for €43m in August and Niclas Füllkrug just a couple of weeks ago, and both are in form. Nkunku has four goals in his past five games, Füllkrug scored a winner on his debut! Make it make sense.
It appears that English transfer nous is at an all-time low, with sporting directors showing all the strategy of USA USA USA manager Mauricio Pochettino selecting deadeye Diana Ross for the upcoming Geopolitics World Cup. Liverpool are desperately short of defensive options, and need immediate cover to maintain their push for the top four, so obviously they decided to blow £60m on a defender that won’t arrive until the summer. Good job, Richard Hughes! Coventry are leaking goals, so naturally the Sky Blues have signed three wingers. Relegation-threatened West Ham have replaced three first-team central midfielders with two expensive strikers and the loan signing of an unproven winger from the Venezuelan top flight. David Sullivan is playing chess, not checkers. Exciting young prospects are hoovered up and will almost certainly never be seen again – so long Tottenham’s new 18-year-old Scotland striker James Wilson, go quietly into the north London night; farewell new Arsenal and England Under-19 defender Jaden Dixon, we hardly knew ye. If Ethan Nwaneri can’t get a kick for the Gunners, there’s not much hope for the rest of them.
Even the timing of the deadline (7pm GMT) was filth, akin to eating one’s packed lunch, al desko, at 10.30am. The good business this January was done early: Manchester City have made the largest transfer of the month (£62.5m on Antoine Semenyo) look like good value while securing Marc Guéhi for a ludicrous £20m. It goes to show that the good deals are still out there, even for the well-heeled clubs – and much like a well-heeled shoe, you just have to know where to find them.
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QUOTE OF THE DAY
“I hear completely the opposite: all around Europe that we are the most exciting team in Europe – the most goals, the most clean sheets. Maybe I have different sources” – Mikel Arteta reckons critics – yes, he’s looking at you Paul Scholes – have clearly not had their eyes open when the Gunners have been thrilling the continent with their set piece routines free-flowing football.
FOOTBALL DAILY LETTERS
Interesting idea from Yannick Woudstra in yesterday’s Football Daily letters. But as a way to help Spurs win games, let me be one of the 1,057 to point out that it will surely depend on which 45 minutes they turn up to play in?” – Simon Mazier.
What a coincidence that Yannick is suggesting that games be reduced to 45 minutes, the same day that Jonathan Wilson writes that if that were so, Manchester City would be top of the league by 12 points.
I never thought that the league ought to split into first and second half divisions. Maybe the title could be played out with the winners of both divisions” – Nigel Sanders.
If Snoop Dogg (yesterday’s Next Episode section, full email edition) reckons that the Swans have a shout of making the playoffs, someone should check if he’s smoking something. Just say no, kids” – Martin Clifford.
If you have any, please send letters to the.boss@theguardian.com. Today’s prizeless letter o’ the day winner is … Martin Clifford. Terms and conditions for our competitions, when we run them, are here.
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It’s David Squires on … Ian Holloway’s epic rant and his rage against the machines.
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