55 min: Hato hacks a clearance straight to Gyokeres, who can’t get a shot away but forces the ball into the centre for Trossard, who also is unable to take a whack. Pedro tries to race off on the counter but Gabriel puts a stop to his gallop. This is all really scrappy. Meanwhile Gary Naylor’s here to fix this set-piece nonsense: “The sooner a manager does the Mourinho thing and leaves two or three men up at a set piece or corner so boxes are less crowded and goalkeepers can see the ball, the better.”

53 min: The penalty is checked and cleared, but it’s another corner. And from that second one, which James sends long, Pedro nearly diverts the ball into the bottom right. Raya claims. Arsenal are getting worked over Arsenal-style at these corners. They’re not looking comfortable at all.

52 min: Fernandez advances down the inside-right and aims a low heatseeker towards the bottom left. Raya extends fully to tip around the post for a corner. James swings it to the near post, where Raya punches clear … but also catches Pedro atop the noggin while doing so. VAR is having a good look at this.

50 min: Pedro skittles Saka 35 yards out, to the right of centre. Rice slips the free kick wide to Saka, who passes back to Eze, who can’t return the ball. Chelsea don’t clear their lines, though, allowing Saka to take a potshot from the edge of the D. It’s deflected. Sanchez punches clear with Timber lurking. Gabriel returns it. Sanchez catches it. All very messy.

48 min: The action on the pitch mirrors the noise in the stand. All quiet. This half hasn’t really got going yet. “I know that the split between handling games of football, like rugby, and the kicking games of football, like association football, happened over a century ago,” begins Andy ‘Not That One’ Flintoff. “But now we’re seeing them converge again, what with the maul that forms in the six-yard box every time there’s a long set-piece like a corner or a throw-in. It’s like watching early-80s Wimbledon every time the ball’s dead near the penalty box.”

47 min: The Emirates was bouncing at kick-off. Not so much now. A level of anxiety has enveloped the ground. Half-time Pints not as potent as Pre-Match Afternoon Pints. To further illustrate, here’s Charles Antaki: “Well, what can you say? For the Arsenal fan, expectation, always provisional, is draining down through concern and worry, and, if things don’t improve markedly, it’ll soon reach fear and desolation. Fingers can be pointed at this or that player: this one trying too hard, this one just not being skilful enough, that one just unlucky. Anyway. Not good.”

Chelsea get the second half started. No changes. “This might be the afternoon pint talking, or evening glass of wine in my case, but this feels like a game with more goals in it,” writes Kári Tulinius. “Both defences seem like they went to the pub for lunch. The one problem is that the attackers seem like they joined them.”

Half-time postbag. “The best pint is the first one you have on holiday. Followed by the first one after work on a Friday” – Joshua Keeling

“Whatever about the best pints (usually depends on the company), the worst pints are the half-time variety which you have to queue an age for, come in a plastic cup, and taste like warmed up dishwater. And cost about $15 a pop. Then you miss the goal of the season in the 48th minute trying to carry three or four of them back to your overpriced seat” – Justin Kavanagh

“Your Dundee correspondent Simon McMahon needn’t rely on alcohol to help his mood. He could read the Beano, have a slice of delicious Dundee cake, and watch a couple of 1980’s fish-out-of-water comedies starring Paul Hogan” – Niall Mullen (who, at the risk of editorialising, neglects to mention the option of taking a wander down the waterfront to the V&A where Simon can take in some of the best of Scottish design, before perusing the selection of nippie sweeties in the cafe upstairs)

“If Arsenal had anything like a killer instinct they could already be two or three ahead. Still don’t have the allure of champions” – NickyB

“Apropos of nothing, I have a word for Arteta apparently turning Eze into Jack Grealish: encittification” – Joe Johnson

Half-time entertainment/refreshment. The best sort.

45 min +3: Arsenal fans will demur, but Chelsea kind of deserved that after the Rice elbow that immediately preceded the goal. Arsenal try to respond immediately, Rice flinging a long throw in from the right, but Fernandez clears. On the touchline, Mikel Arteta looks extremely unimpressed.

45 min: A Chelsea corner down the left. It’s sent to the near post, where it flicks off Rice’s elbow and towards the top left of his own goal. Raya does well to claw the ball away for another corner. Rice had his arms around Hato’s neck at the time, so his arms weren’t exactly in a natural position. You’ve seen penalties given for less, but neither referee nor VAR punish him. But it doesn’t matter, because from the next corner …

44 min: Saka launches long down the left for Gyokeres, who tries to dance his way past Chalobah but fails. As Chelsea clear, he dives near the prone Chalobah. He wants a penalty, but should get a yellow card. He gets neither. Chalobah gets up and gives him the what-for.

42 min: Arsenal launch a four-on-three counter. Trossard plays the ball straight to Caicedo, when it was surely easier to hoick it towards Rice, in about half-a-pitch’s worth of space on the left. Much groaning. Those Afternoon Pints wearing off. But it’s OK. Half-time soon!

40 min: Hincapie slaloms down the left and wins a corner. Rice takes, but not before VAR orders the referee over to ensure Rice has placed the dead-ball in the quadrant. What a faff. The resulting corner is a further waste of everyone’s time.

38 min: One simple long batter down the inside-left channel and Gyokeres is away. He cuts into the box but shanks his shot. The ball breaks to Eze, who teams up with Saka to roll the ball to Timber, racing in from the right. Timber chops his way past Chalobah, lovely skill, only to scuff a weak effort into Sanchez’s arms.

36 min: The physio pokes Palmer’s knee awhile, then gives him the OK to continue. He’s immediately back in the thick of the action, combining with Pedro down the middle, an intricate move that nearly splits the Arsenal defence. But not quite.

34 min: Palmer goes down off the ball. A worrying sign for Chelsea, as he’s been their most dangerous player so far. He glances over to the bench with a glum expression.

33 min: The pace drops a bit for the first time in a while.

31 min: Zubimendi plays a ludicrous hospital-infused backpass to Raya, with Pedro close by. There’s just enough juice on the ball to reach the keeper, Raya hacking clear, but Pedro nearly gets there, and is within his rights to challenge. He catches Raya, but there are no hard feelings. Not between Raya and Pedro, anyway. Raya and Zubimendi, that might be another matter.

29 min: Rice opens his body and aims a curler towards the top-right corner. Always wide, always high. The home crowd cheer noisily nonetheless. Afternoon Pints + Goal = Happy Punters.

28 min: Chelsea have enjoyed 56 percent of possession so far, and are edging the xG by a whopping 0.01, their score 0.38 to Arsenal’s 0.37. On Sky, Gary Neville thinks the visitors have a goal in them, which isn’t something he would have said during either leg of the recent League Cup semi-final. So there’s a little care package of hope for Chelsea fans. It’s not a very big one, but we have tied it up in a pretty bow.

26 min: Chelsea respond with a bit of probing down both flanks. Arsenal hold their shape. It’s what they do.

24 min: Rice delivers. Not so good. Chelsea clear. “Preach on, brothers,” begins Simon McMahon. “That afternoon pint of whisky is one of the great joys of modern living. Christ knows I’ve needed it this season as a Dundee United supporter.”

23 min: That’s the eighth own goal scored for Arsenal in their last 21 games. And let’s see if that stat gets bumped further, because they’ve just won another corner in short order, this time down the left.

20 min: Saka sends Timber down the right. Timber wins a corner. There’s the usual Gunneresque pause, then …

19 min: Palmer’s work down the right causes more bother in the Arsenal box. He wins a corner, which comes in from the left, and is left by Hincapie to ripple the side netting. That’s calm defending, because any intervention may have led to an own goal.

17 min: Sanchez hasn’t been on the Afternoon Pints. I’m pretty sure of that. But if you were a bit more cynical … because now he passes out to Rice, and is very fortunate Saka and Gyokeres overplay coming back towards the box and run the ball out for a goal kick. Dearie me. Sanchez is having a nightmare, but he’s got away with it so far. It surely can’t last.

15 min: Eze, just inside the Chelsea half, spots Sanchez way out of his box and creams a shot goalwards. Sanchez ambles back, a little bit too casually, and while he scoops the ball away from the top-right corner, he swats it behind for a corner. Well, it should be a corner, but the linesman doesn’t spot it and waves play on. It was miles out. Arsenal fume. Sanchez with all the hits already.

14 min: James swings a glorious low cross in from the right. The Arsenal defence all over the shop again. But Pedro doesn’t anticipate the ball coming in so sweetly. Had he made the run, he’d have been slotting.

12 min: Not quite sure what the Arsenal defenders were up to there. They’ve not been their usual selves of late, having buckled against Wolves, and allowed Randal Kolo Muani to score one-and-a-half goals in the North London derby. And that wasn’t great.

10 min: Palmer back on the left! His gadding about is causing come consternation in the Arsenal ranks, and this run down the wing draws a foul from Saka. The free kick’s swung in, and drops to Sarr, six yards out and level with the left-hand post. Had that fallen to an experienced attacker, it was surely 1-0 to Chelsea. But the defender on full debut can’t sort his body shape out and slashes wide left. Big chance.

8 min: Sanchez looks super-jittery. Not for the first time in his career, to be fair. He plays a dangerous ball out from his box down the left channel, hoping to find Caicedo. Saka nearly nicks it. Again, had he done so, Sanchez and Chelsea would have been in a world of pain.

7 min: Palmer’s switched back to the right flank. He crosses, but fails to find a team-mate. Arsenal counter, Saka probing down the right and cutting back for Zubimendi, who leans back and hoicks over from distance. The game slowly beginning to open up.

5 min: Sanchez, with the ball at his feet just outside his own box, decides to fall over like a toddler. Or a sports journalist at 4.30pm on a Friday. Backwards he topples, and Gyokeres nearly steals the ball off him. Had the striker managed to do so, he’d be rolling into an empty net. But Sanchez recovers his poise, if not his dignity, to sweep clear. Nearly one of the great goalkeeping nightmares.

4 min: A fairly shapeless start, actually. “The best pints are Thursday night.” Hello Ian McCourt, formerly of this parish. “Or about 1.30pm on a Friday.”

2 min: A mid-octane start to the game. No real shape yet, though it’s obvious that Palmer is prowling the left wing today, opposite to his usual beat.

Arteta and Rosenior embrace warmly … let’s see how long that cross-capital bonhomie lasts … and Arsenal get the ball rolling.

The teams are out … and it’s a cracking derby atmosphere. Everyone a few Afternoon Pints in, I’ll be bound. The best kind of pint? It’s a good type of pint. Anyway, Arsenal are in their world-famous red shirts with white sleeves. Chelsea could be running out in a blue version of that, but their old boss from the 1930s, David Calderhead, didn’t like the sound of the idea when his pal Tom Webster, a cartoonist for the London Evening Standard, suggested it to him during a round of golf. So Webster took it to Herbert Chapman instead, and here we all are. Chelsea are in their equally storied royal blue, and would anyone change any of this today? Doubt it somehow. We’ll be off in a minute or two!

Mikel Arteta’s turn to talk to Sky. “We know playing at the Emirates, the crowd are fully behind the team in every action … we know what we have to do … regardless of any other opponent, the focus is on us … with the players [Chelsea] have they can play in different combinations … we are very aware of that … we want to exploit their weaknesses.”

Liam Rosenior speaks to Sky Sports. “We’re in a decent shape … we’ve created a really good connection with the players … but for a few lapses of concentration it would be ten wins out of 12 and would put us in a really good spot … we have many games to go and improvements to make … overall it’s been a decent start for me and my staff … we have different ways to play and different shapes … those two games in the League Cup were very early when I came in … we had a lot of injuries … those team-sheets were very different to today’s team-sheet.”

Pre-match reading. And plenty of it.

Arsenal are unchanged from last weekend’s North London derby. Well, if it ain’t broke. Club captain Martin Ødegaard and Ben White miss out altogether.

Chelsea are coming off the back of a disappointing 1-1 home draw with Burnley, and make two changes. One is enforced, with Wesley Fofana suspended; Mamadou Sarr, making his Premier League debut, takes his place. Meanwhile Jorrel Hato comes in for Malo Gusto, who drops to the bench.