LIVE ON BIG WEBSITE
Before we get going, a reminder to join our team of writers for all the latest transfer deadline day updates before the window slams shut (in most major leagues) at 11pm BST. Get on it.
NOT SO HOT(SPURS)
While Football Daily isn’t going to claim to have looked too hard, the earliest mention we could find of Tottenham Hotspur being “in very real danger” of having to play Lincoln City home and away this season dates back to early March. Thomas Frank had been sacked a couple of weeks previously and fabled firefighter Igor Tudor had arrived in north London, only to lose his first two matches. While the weird but mercifully brief fever dream prompted a deluge of further hand-wringing, Spurs eventually avoided the drop thanks to replacing the Croat with Roberto De Zerbi. A more passable version of Red Adair, the Italian masterminded heroic wins over already-relegated Wolves, a Villa side focused entirely on Bigger Vase and an Everton team who had last done anything of interest 31 years previously. Not so much a miraculous escape, as a quite fortunate one aided by the benevolence of the fixture generator, it prompted the club hierarchy to hose cash in all directions, all the better to ensure Spurs never find themselves circling the drain again.
So how’s that going, eh? Just two top-flight games into the new campaign and De Zerbi’s much-bolstered squad is already rock bottom of the table and six points off the early pace set by their relegation rivals Hull City. And having completely embarrassed themselves at Brentford on the opening weekend of the season, you could have been forgiven for presuming their first home game of the campaign might have been prefaced by a modicum of humility. Eh? Eh? Oh. “We’ve spent and we’ve spent and we’ve spent!” whooped the designated club hype man in his pre-match address from the Tottenham Hotspur Stadium sward, a field of nightmares upon which Beyoncé has played twice as many gigs as the three league wins Spurs managed last season. “We’re back! We’re going places! We’re huge!”
Approximately 90 minutes and a third consecutive home defeat at the hands of Newcastle later, there was scarcely a peep from said hype bro, so loud was the jeering of Geordies revelling in the obvious discomfort of their former midfielder Sandro Tonali, who could scarcely have done less to justify his £100m summer fee before being hooked in raucous ignominy. “Forget the result,” cooed De Zerbi, after witnessing his side go down to goals from Anthony Elanga and Yoane Wissa. “I am not angry, we are working well and were unlucky today with the result. There is no panic. I know where we are going and what the plan is.” Of course everyone has a plan until they get the kind of smacks in the face dished out by Brentford and Newcastle but De Zerbi can at least take heart from the fact that on Saturday, Tottenham looked pretty impressive until they didn’t. It’s a minor victory that will have to do until obliging Everton come to town in two games’ time.
RECOMMENDED FOLLOWING
Now on BlueSpace, TikBook, Instachat, all the lesser disgraces.
QUOTE OF THE DAY
“It is a decision that hurts my soul but I know it is time. I love, have loved and I will always love being part of the national team. I have emptied myself: now I have nothing more to give and, besides, there are great young players coming through who deserve to be [selected]. I love you! I thank God for making me Argentinian” – Lionel Messi, with the heaviest of hearts, bids farewell to international duty.
FOOTBALL DAILY LETTERS
As probably the greatest player in history has announced his retirement from international football, I’d like to do likewise. Sure, the ingrates never picked me, overlooking my abilities through several World Cups and Euros, but I feel that, like Messi, the time has come to finally hang up my … ah, hopes of a call-up. But never say never, eh? Look all that happened when the little maestro changed his mind last time around! So, yes, I could still be talked out of this decision, should my country decide they need me. Thank you and …goodbye. For now, at least” – Justin Kavanagh.
Early days but Emi Martínez’s transfer for £7.5m seems like the bargain of the season. OK, he let in three against Brighton but saved many more and transformed Chelsea’s defence. I wonder how much they could sell Robert Sánchez on for? I predict, probably much more than £7.5m” – Nigel Sanders.
So August has just ended and my household is already in a contest to see ‘who can have the most miserable season’, which should cheer up anyone whose pre-season optimism has had an early blow. Me: Luton – one win from three in League One with 10 goals conceded. My wife and son: Spurs – say no more. My other son: West Ham – one win from three in the Championship. It’s going to be a long nine months” – Kevin Goddard.
If you have any, please send letters to the.boss@theguardian.com. Today’s prizeless letter o’ the day goes to … Justin Kavanagh. Terms and conditions for our competitions, when we run them, are here.
This is an extract from our daily football email … Football Daily. To get the full version, just visit this page and follow the instructions.
