So ends another night of rip-roaring entertainment in the League Cup. Same time, same place tomorrow, people. Let’s climb that Matterhorn together.

A freekick to Swansea in stoppage time, near the left-hand corner flag at Liverpool’s end. A chance to stick the ball in the mixer, Swansea style. They mess it up.

There have been 23 minutes without a goal at Craven Cottage. I can only assume that play has been suspended due to a provocative drone invasion.

Another change at Anfield: to tremendous, vaguely desperate acclaim, Balotelli is thrust into the fray. In place of Lambert, who looks glum as he jogs off. Would have been interesting to see them on the pitch together, especially just after Lallana’s arrival.

Chris Baird has just headed over the bar from six yards as WBA chase an equaliser. Meanwhile, Brendan Rodgers used a break in play at Anfield to consult this MBM and, as a result, has introduced Lallana for Markovic.

Rodgers hasn’t made any changes yet. I haven’t got time to check right now but I’d be interested to see how long he’s had Lambert and Lallana on the pitch together at the same time since signing them: they’ve thrived together for years and you’d think that’s a connection that could help Liverpool’s cohesion. Lallana’s still on t he bench for now though.

“I guess you had to say ‘The Shrews will not be tamed’ eventually, especially with the outcome now in doubt,” chirps Steven Forstneger. “If you had to do it over again, I would have suggested using that phrase with every update.” How about we brainstorm to predict other possible headlines from this match tomorrow?Perhaps if they home side come back and win we may be able to talk of PLEASURE SHREWS. Or even suggested that the glamour boys were rocked by the Motley Shrews?

Liverpool appear to be sagging at Anfield and Swansea are growing in boldness. Elsewhere, Swindon have gone 3-0 up at Chesterfield.

Victor Anichebe goes down in the box at Bournemouth but the referee waves play on. That’s the fifth appeal he has turned down tonight. I wouldn’t like to face him in court.

Liverpool remain on top against Swansea in the second half but still do not look like scoring. The most creative thing we see tonight may well be certain people’s attempt to blame Mario Balotelli for this ...

Drogba opens fire from 25 yards, bringining an awkward save from the Shrewsbury keeper. In other news, Kurt Zouma’s middle name is Happy. Which is beautiful. Though not as beautiful as the name of the Zambian midfielder, Laughter Chilembe. See that people, names that mean something, not like Peter or Martin or Julie or Paul.

Oooooh! Shrewsbury mount a rebellion and are almost rewarded with a goal! A long freekick into the area was cleared as far as the edge, and Akpo-Akpro left fly with a half-volley that deflected just wide! Moments later Collins lashes a fine effort past the post from long range. The Shrews will not be tamed.

Chelsea have come out for the second half as if determined to put Shrewsbury back in their place. Even Mikel is in the opposing area, trying to get on the end of crosses.

Shelvey curls a 20-yard freekick around the wall. Jones parries and Liverpool waffle it away.

Swansea are perking up at Anfield. It’s as if they, like most viewers, feel that this has the vibe of a game that Liverpool will dominate in sterile fashion before being hit with a bloody counter-punch.

Coutinho is at the hub of everything creative that Liverpool are doing. Another burst by him ends when he offloads to Lucas, who sends a shot into the Mersey. Is there a Liverpudlian equivalent of Fred Davies?

Good, patient play by Liverpool as t hey continue to try to pick a way through Swansea’s well-drilled defence. Coutinho nips the ball into Markovic, who feeds Borini. The Italian swivels nicely at the edge of the box and fires just wide.

Schurrle, a World Cup winner, crosses. Cahill, a World Cup participant, meet it with a header. Connor Goldson, a stranger to most football fans, clears with aplomb. That’s how it’s going at the New Meadow tonight. Fred Davies would be proud at half-time.

Ay-aye-aye! A sweeping counter-attack for Liverpool ends when Henderson slips the ball through to Markovic, who has a chance to improve the early impressions of him at Anfield .... but instead shanks the ball high and wide.

GOAL! Fulham 1-0 Derby (Dembele 26) They’ve been well on top and really didn’t need a helping hand from Derby, but a shoddy backpass from Forsyth came to their aid all the same. Dembele intercepted it and rounded the keeper to open the scoring.

An excellent intervention by Grandisson foils Drogba after the Ivorian was supplied by Salah, Chelsea’s most enterprising attacker so far.

A long throw-in is always good for a laugh. With Demetriou, Shrewsbury have a man who can deliver same. But Zouma won’t be cowed and he nods the latest one away at the near post.

Manquillo, who has been raiding relentlessly down the right for Liverpool, wins another corner. Coutinho plops it on the head of Lambert, who guides a header just over the bar from eight metres or thereabouts.

Nathan Byrne has put Swindon 2-0 up at Chesterfield. But an even bigger story could be developing at the New Meadow, where Shrewsbury’s speed, strength and insolence is really annoying Chelsea.

Drogba clears a corner as Shrewsbury continue to jab at their illustrious visitors. But suddenly Salah is racing into their half at the head of a Chelsea counter-attack. He scampers all the way into the box and then dinks the ball over to Schurrle, but it was slightly behind the German, who can only nod it sideways. Shrewsbury tidy up.

Forget the Cup for the moment: Yaser Kasim has put Swindon 1-0 up at Chesterfield. That’s the magic of League One for you.

Liverpool are looking good at Anfield, full of verve and attacking intent. But no penetration yet. The same could be said of Shrewsbury. “Good to see there is no game too unimportant for players to surround and harangue the referee as half of the Chelsea team have just done to Mr. Swarbrick in the 21st minute following a yellow card given to Ake,” snarls JR Illinois.

Dembele is put through one-on-one with the Derby keeper - and Roos wins that duel, pushing the striker’s shot well away.

Lovely play by Coutinho at Anfield. The Brazilian waltzes past two players and in from the left before rolling the ball into the path of Lucas. The lesser Brazilian lashes the ball at goal first-time from the edge of the box, but Tremmel clasps it.

We at the Guardian can also cater to all tyour League One needs. Look: Orient 0-1 Preston 1, courtesy of a goal by Callum Robinson. Still 70 minutes to go in that one.

A freekick to Liverpool about 25 yards out. With no Steven Gerrad on the pitch, Henderson pulls rank and nominates himself to take it. And then he balloons it over the bar. Meanwhile, Chelsea’s struggles continue as Ake cops a yellow card for hacking down an opponent after losing the ball.

The game at Anfield has kicked off - 15 minutes later than the others ones, except Fulham v Derby - and Jonjo Shelvey seems intent on reminding Rodgers that he let a good midfielder go. Some purposeful running from the youngster has put Swansea on the front foot early doors.

Shrewsbury continue to bother Chelsea, Collins flashing a header narrowly wide after again getting the jump on the visiting defence.

Liam O’Neill sends a header just wide from the penalty area as West Brom wake up in Bournemouth.

A big chance for Bournemouth to crown their good start with a goal! Adam Smith hurtled all the way forward and into the box before knocking the ball over to Kermorgant, whose shot was well blocked by Gamboa.

There’s a bumper crowd at Bournemouth and so far they are being treated to a decent display by Eddie Howe’s troops, who have the upper hand so far, with WBA yet to muster a shot.

Cech forced into urgent action again, this time to intercept a Collins cross after the forward raced past Cahill. Uppity stuff from the League Two team!

An escape for Chelsea! Zouma misjudges the flight of the ball from the corner and Knight-Percival gets a powerful downward header to it from eight yards. Cech makes a smart block on his line.

Schurrle, having recovered from flu, runs healthily down the left and pings in a cross that almost finds Drogba. Shrewsbury force it out for a corner, which they then defend poorly, giving away another one. This time they scramble it clear and go so far as to win one of their own at the other end.

We’re underway at the New Meadow, where Chelsea are in Tweety Bird yellow and Shrewsbury are wearing Officer Dibble blue. “Aren’t there labour laws to protect folks like Drogba from being overworked?” storms MIke MacKenzie. “It’s just 54 hours since Drogba was subbed on Sunday. Surely José could have given a run out to some academy striker? And what will Roy Hodgson make of this?”

An early blow to Shrewsbury, as James Wesolowski suffered an injury in the warm-up. Liam Lawrence, the former Stoke and Republic of Ireland international, steps in.

A word on some of the Chelsea players with whom you may not be familiar. Andreas Christensen is an 18-year-old Dane who normally plays at centreback but looks like he’ll be at right-back tonight. I don’t know who this Petr Cech character is.

Paul will be here shortly. In the meantime, before tonight’s Shrewsbury Town v Chelsea clash, Barry Glendenning caught up with the Shrews’ James Collins:

“It’s not as frantic on the field and it’s more calm,” says Collins of the difference between playing top clubs compared to the kick and rush of League Two. “But in the stands it’ll be more frantic because the crowd get behind you a lot more when it’s a bigger stage, which is always good. I think Chelsea will probably be the best game I’ve played in terms of opposition, so it’ll be another good test for me and the boys.”

Under the stewardship of Micky Mellon, Shrewsbury have passed recent tests comfortably and four consecutive league wins have left them fourth in the table, three points behind the leaders, Luton Town. A week ago they put five past Bury without reply, following up with a weekend victory over Portsmouth in which players could have been forgiven for getting lost in a Chelsea-related reverie and taking their eye off the ball. Collins insists it was an obvious trap in which they were wary of becoming ensnared. “You should enjoy these moments but if you dwell on them too much they can bounce back to bite you,” he says.

Despite Bradford City having proved as recently as two seasons ago that while unlikely, it is not beyond the wit of a League Two side to make it to the Capital One Cup final, all available evidence suggests these particular Shrews should not take a great deal of taming by the mixture of first-team stalwarts and reserves likely to be fielded by Mourinho. “In their previous game in the Cup [against Bolton] they played some big names and some not-so-big names, but whoever they play it will obviously be a tough test because they’re all Chelsea players,” Collins says. “Personally, I’d rather the really big-hitters play because then you’ve got something to remember the game by and hopefully get a shirt afterwards.”

Asked to imagine what might happen in a hypothetical situation where his side are losing 3-0 in the dying minutes and his manager is offered one of his opposite number’s famously premature handshakes, Collins laughs. “Jesus, I dunno,” he says. “I think you’ve have to have that much respect for Mourinho you’ve probably got to shake his hand. I don’t know what the gaffer would do in that situation, to be honest. Hopefully we’ll be beating them and won’t get to find out.”